Saturday, May 26, 2007

The Sweater that Hurt Me

If only it could be more like the sweater (or super hot spy) that loved me. The word for today is "pabo". That's Korean for "fool", and that's what I am for trying to knit a sweater in 4 days. Oh, I did do it, speeding away on some Addi Turbos, all top down in the round raglan. It was only after I finished. Several hours after I finished, actually, that my hand began to kill me! Painful throbbing, much worse than I'd ever had before. So I've been taking it easy. Took a few days off, then did a little crochet, no more than 15 minutes at a time with long breaks. Wow, that was stupid.

Anyway, here it is. Inspired by Tomato. I made the neck a scoop neck instead of a square neck, did a different color/texture pattern across the chest (I made it up!), and did a tiny bit of color detail on the neck, sleeves, and waist. I considered doing all those in corrugated ribbing, but ultimately decided against it as overwhelming. Anyway, 5 balls of Valley Yarns Colrain (merino/tencel) and a little bit of some Cascade Pima Tencel in white I had around, size 7 needles, done from Friday morning to Tuesday morning. Do you think this pattern is interesting enough to warrant being written up?



I've been noticing that other people's Tomatos have come out a lot more form fitting. Other people's tops in general. Like look at this lovely one. What is up with the tops I make? They never are that closely fitted. It's as though I need to do twice as many decreases after the bust (going top down). Is this because I have too small a waist? Cuz that's what I want to think. Yes, that's it, too small a waist.

In other news, I've been thinking about men lately. The trail of thought was brought about identity theft guy. Oh, didn't I tell you about him? I was walking home one night and some dude flagged me down, which happens, but he was wearing a suit and tie. So I thought I was about to be proselytized to. But he asked me to have dinner with him and his coworkers. Right then. No thank you, I just bought dinner. Also, that's weird. Well, he just wanted to tell me how sharp I was looking, blah blah blah, can he have my phone number, blah blah blah. And then he asks, "what do you know about identity theft?" skrrrrrreeech! That's the sound of the needle scratching across the same old record. Excuse me? He wondered if I knew that the previous week, thousands of Chicagoland teachers had their identity stolen. Um, nooo, I didn't know that, nor did I know flirtation nowadays was being mixed with infomercials. And then he handed me a DVD on indentity theft. I still haven't watched it, as I'm sure one of two things must be true: (1) it's like that video in The Ring that curses everyone to die within a week of watching it unless you make a copy and show it to someone else, or (2) There are just like 100 naked, variously posed pictures of himself on it.

And this got me to thinking of various men encounters I've had. This one was pretty mild and harmless. But there was the shouting match between me and about 6 dudes in Zimbabwe as they surrounded the telephone booth I was in and pounded on the glass. When they finally left and I made my international phone call to my Daddy, I burst into tears, not so much from fear, but from anger and frustration. I wanted to kill. I was 17.

There was the crazy dude in Korea who grabbed my ass, ran to the end of the block, and then started jumping up and down and pointing and laughing at me (this was the clue that gave me a hint that he might be crazy). I chased that dude for a full on 10 minutes. It was almost comical. We got tired, and the chase just turned into a fast walk. Then when we regained our breath, the running was on again. Across the street, through the park. Finally I did manage to catch him, tell him off in the most broken Korean ever, and hit him. At least I turned that one into a funny story, which won me "inki sang" (popularity prize) in a Korean speaking competition.
Here's my class cheering me own. Signs say "Go, Nikki!" and "We love you, Nikki!" Awww.



Then there was the group of drunk men in South Africa who wouldn't let me pass one evening as I was bringing home dinner. Really, one just kept stepping in front of me so I couldn't pass. So I hit him, and he let me go. Though I was always speaking English, they continued to talk to me in Zulu. I don't think they realized I wasn't Zulu.

And just this week some little kid hit on me. He looked about 18, but he showed me his ID that said he was 20. He had earlier lied to say he was 22. If you have to lie to be at 22, you're too young for me (my 29th b-day is Thursday). He invited me over for food, I told him I had my own food, he was like, "oh you got a Link card? Good, I'm tired of eating McDonald's." Oh, Kiddie got jokes? Then he touched my hair (!) and asked if I needed it braided. I was like, "look little boy, if you touch my hair again, I'm going to have to spank you." Come to think of it, maybe he would have liked it. Hmm, and I thought I left that whole strangers-touching-my-hair thing in Korea.

The point is . . . . wait, was there a point? Oh yeah, you know, girls aren't ever running up on me and grabbing my ass and touching my hair and shouting profanity at me. Or handing me possibly cursed and/or pornographic "identity theft" dvds. What is up, dudes? Why is this world so full of men hurting or harrassing women? Y'all need to chill on that, for real. I guess I should look at the bright side, since in both the Zimbabwe and South Africa cases, other men took the offenders away. Maybe I should focus on those men.

23 comments:

Silvia said...

Sorry to hear you hurt your hand.
But the top is Lovely. Capital 'L' in Lovely, yes?
I vote 'YES' for writting down the pattern.
bw, Silvia

somebunnysloveDOTcom said...

Had the same thing happen when I knit a pair of socks in 2 days for Sock Madness. As for those crazy weirdos -- they're MEN. 'Nuff said!
=:8

rho said...

came over from KR - the sweater looks fantastic on you - and YES to writing down the pattern -

Happy Bday Thursday - mine is Monday and Hubbies is on June 10th -- Gemini's Rock! ;)

Batty said...

I really like the fit of your tops! They're still form fitting, but not so form fitting that you can't wear them to work, school, or any other place where skin-tight isn't admissible.

The hand/wrist pain comes from overdoing it. I had it so bad once, I couldn't even pick up a magazine with my left hand for about two weeks. If you take a break and don't knit or lift anything heavy, though, it goes away completely.

Knitterbug said...

I love your top, please write the pattern down;) Sorry about your hand, give it a rest and put some ice on it.
Happy birthday to you!
I had to laugh out loud at your men story, especially the Korean one, you are too funny!

AR said...

Four days! Holey cow!

Guys are just crazy. It's really creepy and weird for me, when kids my sons' ages hit on me. Yikes! I may be a young mom, but no way!

Brown Berry said...

I can't begin to explain or even understand the way some men behave; what I did notice though is that in each of the incidents you stood up for yourself (for women with sense!) and took some action. That's all we can hope for for our girls. Sweater looks great, and with your skillz, I know you'll figure out how to get the figure flattering look you're after.

Molly said...

It looks fantastic! Do rest your hands--for one thing, they deserve a little pampering after cranking out that beauty. ;)

The top you linked to had two inches of negative ease--that's probably the main difference (though I hear you on the small waist thing--it's as bad or worse for those of use who aren't as slim as you but have crazy hip(&bust)-to-waist ratios.

For the other, well, that's life in the patriarchy. Viva la revoluccion! You might like some of the better feminist blogs out there--maybe Pam's House Blend or the Feminism 101 blog (the latter suggestion isn't meant to guess at your level of knowledge; I find it highly useful, and I consider myself at least an intermediate patriarchy-blamer).

beadexplorer said...

I hope you'll have a great birthday. I love coming back and seeing your neat knitted pieces and reading what you have to say. You have a great talent for writing!!! And yes, there are a lot of mad men out there. Blame it on their hormones. But sometimes you find a man who is not that weird. But it's hard. And yes, you should focus on men like these! :)

3goodrats said...

Boys are dumb and have cooties.

Your sweater is super-cute! Definitely warrants a write-up.

Happy birthday! Mine is just a few days after yours :)

Adrienne said...

Sorry about your hand and your sweater looks awesome!

turtlegirl76 said...

I love the way your pseudo-tomato turned out. If you made enough changes to call it a new pattern, then yes, you should write it down.

Virtuous said...

" didn't know that, nor did I know flirtation nowadays was being mixed with infomercials" ROTFL!! That happened to me before..WITW?!

My hand is giving me fits too. Poppin and all! sigh....

Happy B-day in advance!

David said...

He was actually trying to help you by offering you a home-based business opportunity. However he did not do you a favor by handing it to you and not telling you what it was. He did a sorry job job, for sure. If it is what I think it is, you should take a look at it though. It is a legitimate deal. I looked at it and I enrolled in the service.

It will lead to a brand new blog, I am quite sure of that.

Keep me posted and let us know what is on the DVD!!

James said...

I'm really not sure what makes guys think that anybody is going to respond positively to being grabbed or shouted at. Don't worry, it happens to dudes as well. I was constantly being grabbed in my youth by the wrong element and last night a group of sorority girls grabbed my boyfriend's junk looking for piercings. I guess there are creeps of all kinds. Killer sweater, though.

Larjmarj said...

The sweater is super cute! Love the colors you used. It's a Killer Tomato. hee hee.
As for Dudes....who knows what is lurking in their beedy little brains.

gretchen said...

That sweater looks gorgeous!! I'm knitting Tomato in the blue sky cotton on size 6 (! - to get gauge) and I'm afraid my arm is going to fall off - I know how you feel.

And those stories are both creepy and hilarious. It's all in the delivery, I guess....

WandaWoman said...

The top is really cute, but you really can't keep overdoing it, you will end up hurting yourself in the long run.

Angie said...

Umm, the men stories are frightening, I thought I always attracted the strangest man in the room, I think you win. I lurve your version of Tomato and think it looks just perfect - perhaps your waiste IS very small. Happy early birthday

DomesticOverlord said...

I'm sorry all the men you've been around lately seem to be fundamentally retarded. On the bright side your sweater is adorable and it looks great on you.

I have to admit your hair does look really soft. I kinda want to touch it. But I wouldn't. Okay, I'd ask first. ;)

Merry Gentlemen said...

Sometime they combine identity theft with hurting/harrassment. Then life gets really interesting.

Nikkij said...

Your sweater looks fine. You know you can't compare your work so closely with someone with a totally different physique. Big boobs aren't all their cracked up to be, especially after time goes by. You have to look at that DVD and report back. Pleeeease. I'm sorry that you've had such horrible run-ins with men all over the world. Gee wiz.

phoenix said...

Hee, I think I could match you for inappropriate random men stories, like the time(s) I been hit on by 14 yr-olds -and I'm older than you. Happy belated! I definitely vote for a yes on the pattern. It looks great on you, Though I love the Tomato, I think I might prefer the neckline on yours.