Thursday, March 01, 2007

Something Old, Something New

Something borrowed, something blue. Isn't that how it goes? I'm not getting married (would anybody ever marry me?!), but I do have some old stuff, some new stuff, and some blue stuff to show. Um, nothing borrowed for the moment.

So, last summer when I was in South Africa I knitted this cardigan. It's from the Yarn Girls Guide to the Basics. I didn't like it. It was all bulky and stuff, and the sleeves were a bit short. I've since learned to always lengthen the sleeves for knitting patterns since my arms must be like an inch longer than other people's my size. So I hung it up in the closet with all the ends not woven in with the idea that some day I would rip it out and recycle the yarn. Well, today I looked at it and you know, it's not so bad after all. So I weaved in the ends and am wearing it now. The yarn, Berkshire Bulky, is itchy to me, so it's a good thing this is a cardigan and not a next-to-skin item.

In true "you can take the knitter out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of the knitter" fashion, instead of buttons like the pattern calls for or even a proper shawl pin, it's being held together with an old piece of a necklace I cut up and a darning needle.

Some time last year I also knitted, like everyone else and their momma, an Anthropologie Inspired Capelet. What is this yarn? It's Ironstone something-or-other. It's beautiful yarn, drop dead gorgeous yarn, and I got 2 hanks of it at Stitches last summer. So run to your yarns shops and tell them you want Ironstone Something-Or-Other, quick!

Anyway, I friggin love this capelet. Wanna know a little something about capelets? They look good on everybody. I've seen them on little people and big people, tiny tittied people (witness pic of me below) and boobalicious people (btw, I hate you people). And you know why? Cuz they add more bulk to your boobal area and no bulk to your stomach area, so that your stomach always looks smaller in comparison to your boobs than usual. And for the booby-impoverished like myself. It makes you look like you actually have a little something going up there. Here I am in my classic "you spent too much time in Asia" pose. I did this for the tank photo, too. Now, notice how busty I look.

Close examination of the curvature of the leotard above reveals, however, the true minimalness of the nah-nahs.

Close up pic:

And extreme closeup of the tie with beads. This tie is actually yarn of the discontinued Filatura di Crosa Ultralight, which has been waiting patiently for me to finish a lace tunic in it.

Thanks to my friend for taking these pics. I felt bad asking a married man to continuously take close-up shots of my breastiful area, but, um, not bad enough to stop asking.

*ding ding ding*, this post wins for Most References to Own Breasts in a Single Post! And what do I win, a booby prize! *duh duh, ching!*

Finally, to the new. I made gloves following the Ken Gloves pattern at Berroco. Fingers are hard. There are all these gaps at the base of the finger webs and you have to try your best to cover those up when you sew in the ends. I suck at doing this, but at least they fit. Sorta. I went down a needle size because I (hopefully) don't have man-sized hands and the pattern is for mens gloves. But I still made the fingers too long. Ah well, at least they work at keeping my hands warm. The yarn came from my ever-growing stash, Art Yarns Ultramerino I think, or whichever one is their worsted weight.

Oh, come to think of it, I do have something borrowed. It's this movie:

Man, this is a bad movie. To the couple who lent me this movie, y'all are real sweet and I like you, but this movie sucks (and not in the good way). John Carpenter's Vampires, staring James Woods. I shoulda known, right. The Blade movies, I like. The Underworld movies, I like. This movie? At least I lent you The Grudge, which may not be top notch, admittedly, but dang. Dang, y'all, dang.


Adrienne " A little dramatic at times" said...

WOW! It all looks great! Love the caplet!

AR said...

haha, you crack me up!

Great capelet. The cardigan's cute, too.

dickie said...

lol. that was a good read. thanks! =)
it looks like the capelet definitely does what you say it does. nice work!

Memeeflye said...

I like everyone else made that capelet. I used Knitpicks Sierra. I like yours better- my mom wears mine. Thanks for stopping by

Wanda said...

The capelet is very cute. I'm not sure if does in fact work for bigger folks or bigger busted folks.

OfTroy said...

i love your sweater--and your clasp! i would thread the needle with some extra yarn and then loop the tail of the thread though the 'clasp'--then you'd never misplace the chiba needle.

(and come back for parts 3 and 4 of cast on's.. pictures and references--so you too can know more cast on methods than you'll ever need)

Anonymous said...

I friggn love that caplet too, you look so good in it I want one and I must compliment your fro, very cute.